Hey guys, on today’s life and relationship advice series, I wanted to talk about how to prevent arguments with your husband or wife. Now, if you are in a relationship, if you are married, we all know that arguments are inevitable, they are a part of every relationship. However, there is a way for us to curb or change the direction of the conversation so that it does not lead to an argument.
The way that we interact with each other. And the way that we converse with each other can either have a positive outcome or a negative outcome. And let’s face it, most of us would love to prevent an argument from happening. So let me tell you the steps that you can take in order to prevent an argument. Let’s get started.
1. Don’t internalize
it can be very easy to internalize your emotions to not express yourself or say what’s on your mind at that moment. But I’m here to tell you that if you do that if you follow that route, what will end up happening is that those emotions that you are internalizing will eventually turn into resentments. And when they finally do become resentments, your arguments are going to be a lot worse, and they’re going to be a lot more intense. Before it gets to that step. Make sure that you are communicating with your partner, whether it be your husband or your wife, how you are feeling. What is running through your mind, what are your emotions at that moment? What is it that you need in order for you to feel like the issue or the problem is resolved.
2. Avoid triggers.
Now, I know that sounds so easy, just avoid triggers. But the reality of the situation is you have to get to know your partner in order to fully understand what their triggers are. So for example, maybe your wife doesn’t like it when you leave a plate on the counter. Or maybe your wife doesn’t like it when you leave the toilet seat up. Or maybe your husband doesn’t like it when you leave your bathroom towel on the floor, whatever those little nuances in your relationship may be. Make sure you consciously remember those triggers. Because the last thing that you want to do is push that button or pull that trigger. Because what will end up happening what will ensue is an argument and you are trying to avoid that argument. The point of this video is for you to prevent an argument. So learn those triggers and avoid them.
Communication again, the key to every successful relationship. concise and clear communication is important. You can communicate and you can talk and you can you know have that interaction with each other, but at the end of the day, the most important part is that you are getting your thoughts across your ideas across in a way that your partner can understand you. Because there is nothing worse than being in a relationship and feeling like your partner doesn’t understand you.
It may not necessarily be that they just aren’t taking the time to understand you. It can also be that you are not effectively communicating your needs. So take time. Write down your thoughts. Write down your needs, if you have to before you communicate with your partner if you struggle with communication. If not, make sure you are communicating with your partner on a consistent basis so that you guys are on the same page, which in the end will help will help you to avoid and prevent arguments.
4. Empathy and respect.
I’ll start with respect. Respecting your partner’s ideologies, morals, their perspectives, is incredibly important in maintaining a strong and healthy relationship and at the end of the day, avoiding an argument.
Questioning your partner’s perspective and ideologies is okay as long as it’s a constructive conversation. However, if you continue to dismiss or challenge your partner’s perspectives and ideologies, that may not necessarily be the best thing to do and could eventually lead to an argument. So respecting your partner in that sense is incredibly important. We Remember, you are not better than your partner, you are not less than your partner, you guys are equal. And in doing so, will help you to empathize with your partner as well. Empathy is the ability to understand your partner on an emotional level to put yourself in their shoes. If you are able to understand them, they are able to understand you.
Listening to your partner, and making them feel heard, is extremely important in preventing arguments. I’m sure you’ve all been we’ve all been in a situation where your partner is talking to you, and they are trying to get your attention and try and discuss something with you and you are distracted or your partner is distracted.
You start to get frustrated and you start to feel like your partner is not acknowledging you and that they don’t care about what you are saying. We are trying to avoid this at all costs. So there are two techniques for listening that I want you guys to take into consideration.
The first technique is called active listening in which you are hyper-focused in the conversation, you are not distracted, you don’t have your phone on you, you’re making eye contact with your partner, your knowledge, and your partner. And you’re giving verbal cues that you are understanding what they are saying.
The second form of listening is reflective listening. In reflective listening, basically what you were doing is that you are concentrating and understanding the ideas and the concepts that your partner is telling you. And then you are repeating those concept ideas back to your partner for confirmation of understanding. By doing this, you make your partner feel as if you are fully focused on them, you are understanding them. And that is an important key to avoiding arguments.
6. Allow for space.
Space is incredibly important in a relationship and It’s healthy. Actually, a lot of the times people feel like if you give your partner too much space, then maybe they will start to not pay as much attention to you, or they won’t feel as connected to you, or you may not feel as connected to your partner.
But by giving your partner space and by giving yourself space, allows you to reflect and gives you time to focus on your own needs, on your own, wants things that make you happy. And in doing this and in making yourself happy, you in turn are able to make your partner happy as well. Therefore, you reduce the number of arguments you may potentially have because you both are in a good place emotionally. Also, by giving your partner space you are not suffocating your partner your partner is not feeling like they’re trapped. This is also an important part of preventing arguments.
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If you haven’t, and you just have general questions, I would love to hear all of them in the comment section below.